My Friend Jim

Oh Jim, oh my friend Jim
You left me, you left me again
Oh Jim, my old friend Jim
You went on fighting again

Oh Jim, oh my friend Jim
Still snows, are you cold again?
Oh Jim, my old friend Jim
Hungry and tired, my man?

Oh Jim, oh my friend Jim
Why are you fighting again?
Oh Jim, my old friend Jim
Come home, come home, my friend!

Stray and proud,
Sweet and stout,
Great black cat with white star on his chest
Stole my heart,
Made me smile,
I wish you are safe and free, my old friend!

A.K.

How easy is it

for the walls to crumble?

How much will

does it take to be in control?

Are we only flawed animals

With an illusion of power

Over emotion and thought?

Dangerous to ourselves

And the others; unknowing,

Deceived, blinded and sick we exist.

A.K.

Fear sweeter than nectar

Of melancholy

That feeling penetrating

Chest and sending signals

Making heart rate rise

That feeling of sweet fear

I possess it now

All of a sudden I am the fear

I am the lingering touch

My gaze is ice and scorch

Secret on the surface

You wish you'd  knew

No one and anything else

No chemicals or words

So far beyond, so far away

I wait this world to wither

Faster and readier and calmer

Than a stone spinning in 0-G.

Taking The Dice

Tangled branches cast reflections
In the absence of light, so intricate.
Heart beats faster, recollections
Never before, yet now, so delicate.

Thoughts move quick and deranged
Through vast spaces of the mind.
All decisions have been made
Nothing else there is I can find.

So silent, yet loud, in its voice
No longing, no thoughts whatsoever.
Truly now I have made my choice
To stay afloat tonight, if not forever.

No trust, no opening of the heart,
No more signs of human weakness.
To leave behind all what was tart--
This feeling is truly just a sickness.

I am a castle, I am a wall forevermore.
To lobby for myself only; the night is long.
Nonetheless, the morning has a door
Into normality with the birds' waking song.

All for me, for no one else is this lore:
To be above all games and bitter lies,
Realizing there's always need for more,
I shall leave, taking with me the dice.

A.K.

Sertraline

Sertraline in her mind
Makes it all even
Yet so far from fine
She is now a seaman

A week full of trials
Starring into silence
No more nightmares.
Rigid jaw muscles

Few hours of sleep
Avoiding excesses
And breathing deep
Not making guesses

Damage has been done
Dark side was released
Slowly rising sun
Glimpses of hope in the mist

A.K.

Sips of cold autumnal aerial streams

Sips of cold autumnal aerial streams
Dress the soil in withering husks
In fog have been lost all summer dreams
Last remnants hidden in bleak dusks

So sweet is the feeling of solitude
The magick of desolation is divine
Broken shards that we constitute
Perfect in imperfection, gems o' time

A.K. 

Lethe

Waters of Lethe carry me away
Bring sweet nighttime into day
Let me forget and dull all pain
Make me complete once again


Turn the misery into wine
As I loose all track of time
I am your slave, oh murky river
Bound to the shores of silver


Soon there will be no more me
Feeding on my soul, flowing into sea
Taking more than what you give
Lethe, in your fluid I bereave


Every time so close to drown
Every day not unlike the 'morrow
Shall I gather the remnants of will
And leave the waters so shrill?


Perhaps after I get drenched again..
One more sip of ambrosia into my vein
Another hour in your precious embrace
My mind and body, away they waste

A.K.

Poems

Cat Power, takeoff during a sunset.
Then ambers of the windy city below.
Haven't felt this cozy before on a jet.
The cage became a cradle. Going home.

***

The moonlight dresses shadows
in long silver shrouds.
Crushing waves come to us,
lightnings descent, clouds
Full of rain, it washes through
all ashes and all doubts
As light from fire dances
celebrating all tomorrows.

Step through the door

Step through the door
And shiver no more
Leave stormy seas and your ship behind

Rest by the fire
Tonight you're my Sire
Heal with wine your wandering mind

I will tell you stories
Calm all your worries
With my singing all through the night

Pay me with smile
On this lonely isle
Warm my heart with light of your eyes  

A.K.

Some old poetry I found

Riddle of Steel

I stand bare in front of the storm

No strength left but anger

My hands rust with blood

My vision gets dark, but the heat

From within raises steam in the wind

My voice is gone, I can only scream

I've lost my face, I am a beast

No thoughts but the void

No mercy, no love, no compassion

Only the weapon and the flesh

Bound together forever focused

By the will: I know the riddle of steel

With no fear I rush into battle

To never look behind

Only the misty horizon ahead

Sharp edges of the mountains

Salt of the ocean in the air

No rules, no promises, no fate

I know no other way

I need no reasons but to stand

To not be on my knees on any land

***

Avalanche 

Avalanche, feedback, chain reaction.

Liquid gas unchains from Neptune.

My factory starts a new production,

Movement carries ocean into a tune.

Reactor's bed was concrete.

Never reinforced, it had no fears.

Never intended to be split

By the shimmer of Neptune's tears.

Relation between celestial bodies

Reaches the critical mass, melting,

Setting free the rays for goddess.

Ongoing production, temple's ending.

A.K. 

Within the reach of clasping fists

Within the reach of clasping fists

Yet quite never in their palms

Hidden by shadows and mists

Remembered in only few songs

Cloaks of hemlock intertwined

With hearts shining as sunrise

No compromises, with clear mind

They rush into battles, no disguise

Not to survive or lay their bones

But to taste the history’s nectar

As thorns adoring a wild rose

They pierce fear, bright as a star

To dissipate the enemies

And rise above the blooded ground

As one to conquer these

Shadows & raise from them a mound

A.K.

Moonlight path on the water

Moonlight path on the water
So still, haunting cry of a loon
Would have pleased nature's daughter
As orange flames reach to the moon

Sun long time gone
No place for brightness
Until the night is gone
Careful subtleness

Walk in shadows deep and dark
Sing in whispers, dance in webs
Let the stars become a mark
Of ancient celestial steps

Feel the lake, silver and black,
Taste the air, viscous and cold,
Put a scarf around your neck
Let the northern night its secrets unfold

A.K.

Test Poem - Untitled

Untitled test poem is random in its creation

A range of digits, frequencies of microwaves:

Spirits, teratogens, perhaps mystification.

When there are too many IPs time dilates.

Agoraphobia, Microcastle - suspended animation. 

A.K. 

Power & Control

This was a very long year. But you learned a lot. You learned that you can’t possess people. Power and control is always just an illusion and has no real basis. Yes, some people live under an assumption that there are rules, morals and ethics but in reality an individual does what an individual does. 

Realizing that there’s no control or power [over individuals] makes everything simple. Love is never constant and differs every day. Those who try to enforce any kind of stability into their feelings and emotions are bound to eventually fail. Perhaps, a monk that spent most of his life in meditation will gain the ultimate control of self. But us, mere mortals, can only try.. Once we accept that feelings are similar to weather and ocean tides we can live with them. We can recognize them and let them be. But we shouldn’t force anyone to feel what we feel. We can only try to understand others. Understanding someone is a key to all of his/her secrets. Even though some things are better to remain a mystery.. We just need to learn to tread lightly assuming responsibility for our actions. Because those who don’t have the same understanding of feelings can easily get hurt. Hurt is a product of self-pity and self-entitlement. We experience them when we don’t get what we want. 

Realistically, how many times do we get what we want in life? So why live in almost constant disappointment when we can just accept that we get what we get and sometimes we get what we deserve. 

A.K. 

Mind Is A Prism

I am too tired to live in illusions

To foster and dwell in denial

I have awareness and there’s 

Nothing I hide from myself

How many more shades of grey

Do I discover? Perhaps some day

Everything will be just grey

Mind is a prism that makes all colors

A.K. 

Unbound

Unbound by gravity
Carried by the wind
In-taking sweetness of the summer
Absorbing golden rays of light
Free from my own body
Liberated from foreign minds
I conquer fields and forests
I am the will embodied in flesh
Transcending my weakness
Cultivating unstoppable strength
Rushing through this world
Gaining consciousness
To share with the soil
To share with the skies
So hollow inside
I am resonating.
I am alive.

A.K.

Ladened

Horizon ended where the skies began

All illuminated by a soft light from heaven

Where am I in this picture? Like the Sun

Hidden by the clouds, I’m walking leavened

Ground with soft white linen spun

By winds and my perception. I am saddened,

I am alive, I am one: this’s all ‘till I’m dead

All the ones who love me are spinning my thread.

A.K.

I AM WINTER

I AM WINTER, I AM SILENCE

I AM COLD, I AM DISPAIR

I AM FROST ON YOUR WINDOWS

I AM THE LAST SUNSET

YOU CAN SEE IN YOUR WINDOW

I AM THE END AND THE BEGINNING

I AM YOUR CREADLE 

AND I AM YOUR LOVE

I AM YOUR PAIN

AND YOUR SORROW

ALL THE THINGS YOU CAN’T GET

ALL THE THINGS YOU DREAM ABOUT

ALL THE WORDS YOU WANT TO SCREAM

OUT-LOUD

OUT-LOUD

BUT I AM SO QUIET

I AM NOTHING

AND EVERYTHING

I AM WINTER

A.K. 

Frosted Windows in White Sinews

Frosted windows in white sinews
Let the voices of the wind
Come through in whispers, views
Of barren landscapes, tint
Won't let through street light
That I, admit, never liked
Would rather see candles flicker
They won't make me feel sicker
As brightness can be blinding
And I rarely find it guiding.
Instead I am fighting to preserve
Low tolerance to light,  it serves
Moving shapes of shadows
In the corner of my eyes
Every second one of them dies,
Envelopes, engages in silence
Calls to wonder frozen meadows
And leave all remnants of violence
Like a myriad of ghostly wolves
Singing to the pale sickle,
That left this place for dolls
Such as you and me to cycle
Through seasons of withering soil
Underneath patched concrete to toil
With no purpose but to live,
Love, give and forgive.

A.K.